Two months ago, we wrote about a hot little bargain in Hummerville we pass each day en route to the train–4 beds, pool, $559K–that just didn’t seem to sell, perhaps owing to the horribly offensive black lawn jockey in the front yard.

So enamored of their thigh-high lawn ornament were the sellers that they even featured the guy in the photo one sees when accessing the listing on realtor.com.  

Well, we noticed about a week ago that the For Sale sign had come down. And we noticed Monday that a large dumpster was in the driveway, filled with what looked like moving-out debris.

Could it be?

And, just yesterday, we were pushing Little G up the hill in the stroller after a trip to the playground. A man was taking a break from mowing the lawn, chatting with another man. They nodded hello. I asked if one of them had bought the house. Lawnmower Man said he was renting with an option to buy. We talked about the neighborhood, the schools, the town, and then I of course brought up the lawn jockey. His friend asked if the owner was black; the owner was not. He shook his head in disgust.

We joked about paying some high school kids a few bucks to stick some firecrackers in the thing and blow it up in the name of Uncle Sam. Little G got antsy. We bid farewell.

Well, today I’m flying down the hill on my bike to the train, and, lo and behold, I see a black Hefty bag draped over the offensive black lawn jockey.

My guess is Lawnmower Man has already scored some points with his new neighbors.

I pass this house every day on my schlep to and from the train.

It’s been on the market forever, and I’m sure the owners are thinking, we priced it fairly ($559K for 4 beds in a cozy 1,500 sq ft and what illogically looks like an in-ground pool squeezed into a .11 acre lot), it’s close to the train (10 minute walk, if you hustle), why the hell won’t it sell?

Maybe I can help, folks.

MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE OF THE BLACK LAWN JOCKEY ON THE MIDDLE OF YOUR LAWN!

Folks, these things were deemed either racist or insensitive, depending on your outlook, several decades ago. Now you’ve got hundreds of people stopping by for your open house, and who knows how many thousands checking out your listing on realtor.com, which features the lawn jockey in the listing! Photo #1, no less!

I can’t tell you how tempted I am to steal that thing in the middle of the night.

Great, now TJ is a suspect when the thing actually does get stolen.