I’m waiting for the green at 27th and Park about 10 minutes ago. A man is settling up a cab fare with a cabbie who’s rested his car just west of 27th on Park, right up against a parked car.
The transaction is taking longer than it should; the former rider, slicked back brown hair, 35, blue sweater, jeans, cigarette dangling from his lips, is counting singles like a parolee given an allowance for a strip club.
A bus is behind the cab, waiting to hit 27th but blocked from doing so. The bus is blocking the whole of the southbound lanes on Park, every motorist treated to a huge bus ad about a Lincoln exhibit at the New York Historical Society that says “The Most Beloved Leader That New York Ever Hated.” The bus driver is not happy.
Still, the transaction goes on. The former rider is gesturing to the irate bus driver behind them, and more traffic behind the bus. His movements say, let’s settle the f*** up, a**hole!
Cigarette Man and the driver are feuding over the cost. Cigarette Man gestures again to the mounting traffic and escalating horn noise and says, “You’re the reason for all this!”
Finally, they settle up. Cigarette Man is furious. He slips the singles into his wallet and scoots through the narrow passageway between the cab’s rear bumper and the bus behind it. The cigarette dangles from his lips as his eyes shoot daggers.
You can see where this is going. As they say in the theater, if you’re showing the audience a gun in the first act, you have to use the damn thing in the third act. Indeed, Cigarette Man removes the cigarette from his lips and flicks it at the driver. The butt rolls around on the cab’s hood and stays, like a punt spinning to a stop on the 1 yard line.
Against all logic, the cabbie remains parked, long line of traffic behind him, because of him.
The bus driver has had enough and climbs down. He’s a solid black man of about 45, looks a bit like Cedric the Entertainer.
He goes over to the cabbie’s window.
“Fuck the way!!!” he yells, a bizarre shorthand for “Get the fuck out of the way!”
“Fuck the way!” he repeats, then climbs back into his rig.
Finally, the cabbie does indeed fuck the way, and New York gets moving again.