Straphanger Joe Falls Hard on the 6

Kindle Me

By Straphanger Joe

It was an ordinary day on the Upper East Side near Hunter College and all the hoi polloi and college kids were out in the early morning rush.

I’d been on the surface with some morning business, the usual deal gone bad, and I was heading underground. The chill made me shiver. I pulled up my collar and passed through the turnstile of the 77^th Street station.

The train pulled up and the doors opened crisply. A few people stepped out and I let them go around me. It was the number 6, green line, heading downtown. I entered the car and took my position near the door the way I always do on the F, left side, back to the soon-be-closed-doors, and turned to make sure I wasn’t blocking anyone, when she came in behind me.

Soft, grey, faux leather cover, tan plastic case, gray screen with black letters climbing up and down its body, conga drums beating a hip swaying rhythm as it moved from side to side with its human carrier. It was a Kindle Reader, from Amazon, human attached. I never seen a machine move that way. I heard tell of them from TJ on the Metro North and JerseyJim on Jersey Transit, but I never seen one myself riding on the underground. It would have to be here, on the East Side, of all places that I’d see one.

It’s carrier was a woman in her forties, wearing jeans, a black leather jacket keeping the chill out, long brown hair tied up in a pony tail swaying as she moved, mocking my existence. She held the Kindle loose, but possessively, and took a corner fold-down seat to my right.

I tried not to stare but the faux leather sheath did me in. They said it was ugly. They said it was klunky. But I tell you it was neither. It was mesmerizing. The woman stared at it and I stared at her. She wrinkled her brow as if feeling my gaze upon her and I looked away just as she looked up. I pulled my collar out and noticed I was sweating. My heartbeat thudded in my ears. The door closed behind me and the train took off.

When she left at 42^nd street, the Kindle peering over her human’s shoulder with a doll-faced look, I took a sigh of relief, found a seat to relieve my shaking legs. The thing is you see one of those babes on the 6-train and sooner or later, some dark stormy night, when you’re least expecting it, you’ll see another one on your beloved F. Then there’ll be hell to pay in cold green cash.

I’m not ready for it, see? Just … not … ready for it.

[image pictureshowman.com]