Dude, I’m sorry.

It was a long day and I was tired. I wanted to sit on the train and sip my Sam Adams quietly.

I also wanted to tip you, it being the holidays and all, and you guys almost always being so nice.

It was to be a modest tip, mind you, just a quarter on a $2.25 purchase.

I paid for my beer then stepped to the side of your cart to make room for another customer. I poked around in my pocket as you helped the next person on line, then settled on what I thought was a quarter.

Alas, Thomas Jefferson’s aristocratic mug stared back at me as I pulled it from my pocket. The nickel!

Then the awkwardness ensued. I had nothing but that nickel and some pennies, and there I was, stuck at the side of your cart. I couldn’t just walk away without dropping something on your tip cup.

So I threw the nickel in there and tried to pass it off as a quarter. Ah, but I’m sure you knew full well of my skullduggery, Mr. Beer Man, your ears well-trained to tell the difference between a quarter and a nickel as it drops in your cup.

I know now that I should’ve walked away instead of insulting you with a 2% tip.

Sorry, dude. Next time.

Sincerely,

Trainjotting